Recently my life took a turn into becoming a business owner with my husband, and I have really had to learn how to adjust and find a new balance in my life. Between self-care, mom life, wife life, social life, boss babe, and of course working with Morgan here at Fit Balm, it has been a bit of a learning curve. As my stress level has risen trying to have everything under control, and things not being the way I want them to be (control freak much??), it has become much more apparent as to why finding the balance is so important in my life as a mom. Here are some tips I have that have been working for me, I hope they can help you find some life balance too!
Always make time for self-care!!! Work out, go for a walk, have a coffee date by yourself, spend a morning in bed if you can, whatever it is that you need to center yourself and recharge just do it! Make it non-negotiable. You can not give to others in your life from an empty tank, you will end up crying in the shower with a bottle of wine or hiding in the closet with a package of Oreos, (which are vegan btw!)
Make lists/schedules to stay focused and in charge of your day. Your schedule may vary day to day so you can make it look however you need, and if an emergency comes up (“Hello? Mrs Lynn, your son face planted at school today, and because he hit his head we need you to come in and determine if you want him to stay at school or go home.” - Yes this happened, he was fine!!), you can shift things around as needed and determine what can wait another day and what can't.
Partner and Social time!! I can not express how important it is to connect socially in times of stress. Have a date night, girls night, let loose, connect and talk about what is going on in your world and how you are feeling. Be genuine and authentic with yourself and your social network, life is better when we aren't pretending everything is perfect!. On the partner side of things, sometimes we forget that they are our best teammates, and we feel like we're on opposing teams because they aren't seeing things from our point of view. Tell them what you need and why!! Maybe it's as simple as you need them to cook dinner one night a week so you can focus on getting more work done, or so you can have that hour of self-care. Whatever it is COMMUNICATE!! One woman does not have to do it all, and as independent as we are, IT IS OK TO DEPEND ON SOMEONE FOR SOME HELP! And if you don't have a partner and are a badass doing this whole mom thing on your own, first off kudos to you, and secondly, reach out to whoever you can whenever you need it, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
I have found that these things have made it so much easier to handle the mom things when I have some semblance of order in my day to day. Kids can feed off of our emotions and if you find it feels like your kids are pushing every last button there is, drop what you are doing and take a time out. (My go to “time out” is hitting the beach, the water really calms me and my kid is always super chill afterward too.) I hope you can all find the balance needed in your life, and stay kind.
Oh, and one final piece of advice...DO NOT LET MOM GUILT CONSUME YOU!!!